Maybe I'll keep my mouth shut a little more often.

A small lesson about opening ones' mouth before knowing all the facts.


A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants.

"Well," he said, "I've been seeing this girl for a while and she's really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight's "the" night. We're having dinner with her parents, and then we're going out. And I've got a feeling I'm gonna get lucky after that. Once she's had me, she'll want me all the time, so you'd better give me the 12 pack." The young man makes his purchase and leaves.

Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessing, and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl leans over and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious person."

He leans over to her and says, "You never told me that your father is a pharmacist!"

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a man with a huge knife comes around the corner,

locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock, cal 40, and you are an expert shot.

You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?


Politically Correct Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor! Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 911?

Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.



Non Poitical Answer:


BANG!



My "not so Politically correct , Redneck" Answer.


BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.

............... (sounds of reloading.)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.


Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?


Son: Can I shoot the next one!


Wife: You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!